Written by Joe Maynard
Recorded, mixed and mastered by Mark Thornton at Sidekick Studios.
Holidays are always interesting when your Dad is a devout Christian who married 14 times...
UPCOMING GIGS IN THE NEW YORK CITY AREA:
Pete's Candy Store in Brooklyn, NY
Friday, Jan 20, 11pm
Cowgirl-Seahorse, Southstreet Seaport area Manhattan
Monday, Jan 30, 7-10pm
Dogwood, Beacon NY
Sat, Feb 18, 8-ish til whenever...
lyrics
Christmas Ain’t Christmas Until Somebody Cries
Christmas down home, in Nashville Tennessee
in a world full of rhinestones, and D-I-V-O-R-C-E. You could
cut the tension with a carving knife
& if he weren’t so sex-dependent Dad would dump that 7th wife
Chorus:
Christmas ain’t Christmas til somebody cries
until the bells of silence break through the din of lies
Christmas ain’t Christmas ’til someone slams a door
Christmas just ain’t Christmas ’til you can’t take it anymore
short solo
Now, if your girlfriend is Asian, conversation might go something like this:
Dad says, “you know I was stationed in North Korea,”
& leans in like he’s gonna kiss,
“Now, Asian Women they’re the most beautiful women to ever exist.”
Then wife number seven throws her bowl of cherry cobbler
at the portrait of wife number six
Chorus
Christmas ain’t Christmas til somebody cries
until the bells of silence break through the din of lies
Christmas ain’t Christmas ’til someone slams a door
Christmas just ain’t Christmas ’til you can’t take it anymore
long solo
We woke up Christmas morning, my girlfriend and I
to the sound of something crashing, so I took a look outside
Wasn’t Santa, or his reindeer, up there on the roof
No, that seventh wife knocked over the Christmas Tree
and ran off in her walking boots
Chorus
credits
released November 18, 2022
Joe Maynard -- Voals, accoustic guitar
Mark Thornton -- Electric guitars
Heather Moulder -- Piano
Eddie Lange -- Steel guitar
Dennis Crouch -- Upright Bass
Matty Meyer -- Drums
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